When a Friend Dies
Just a year ago my world was shaken when a good friend called, informing me of the death of their youngest son. A young man in his mid twenties full of life and energy. More than just a friend, he was my god-son. I knew him and loved him from the day he was born. I sewed an infant-size outfit for him and if you knew me you would know what a labour of love that was; a seamstress I’m not! I was so in love with the little guy I just didn’t see that a store bought gift involved the same investment of love.
I knew the parents were crushed and devastated; literally heart-broken. For days a heaviness I could not escape rested on me. To make matters worse I opted not to attend the memorial service. I would have had to fly to another province and on my return go directly to the hospital for surgery. I knew I would need all my strength, physical and emotional for optimum recovery. I waffled for days on that decision and finally did the wise thing and stayed home; and wept! I don’t think I ever touched the heart of Jesus like I did that week. Realizing that He in His human form hurt so badly when His friend died, He wept too.
Now, I don’t know about you, but I’ve said some pretty dumb things in an effort to be comforting, and I’ve heard some dumb things. One thing that has become clear to me is, it is ALWAYS okay and acceptable just to BE there, eyes open and alert. To SEE little things that need to be done and DO them. Above all, if you dare to say, “Let me know if you need anything” ( and I wouldn’t recommend that approach ) please be prepared to fulfill the request. It’s only an empty platitude otherwise!
It’s good to grieve and weep for a season. But like Jesus at the graveside of His friend, Lazarus, after weeping take that one step further and bring life back into the situation.
Not all of us will raise the dead back to life, but all of us, by the grace of God, are able to bring life-filled words to someone’s aching heart. In sowing the seeds of life and joy we can literally see the hurting come back to life when they feel as if they, too, had died.
On life’s pathway we may often stumble and fall, stub our toes and scrape our knees. Let’s get up again, embrace life and continue on the way to the party!
I knew the parents were crushed and devastated; literally heart-broken. For days a heaviness I could not escape rested on me. To make matters worse I opted not to attend the memorial service. I would have had to fly to another province and on my return go directly to the hospital for surgery. I knew I would need all my strength, physical and emotional for optimum recovery. I waffled for days on that decision and finally did the wise thing and stayed home; and wept! I don’t think I ever touched the heart of Jesus like I did that week. Realizing that He in His human form hurt so badly when His friend died, He wept too.
Now, I don’t know about you, but I’ve said some pretty dumb things in an effort to be comforting, and I’ve heard some dumb things. One thing that has become clear to me is, it is ALWAYS okay and acceptable just to BE there, eyes open and alert. To SEE little things that need to be done and DO them. Above all, if you dare to say, “Let me know if you need anything” ( and I wouldn’t recommend that approach ) please be prepared to fulfill the request. It’s only an empty platitude otherwise!
It’s good to grieve and weep for a season. But like Jesus at the graveside of His friend, Lazarus, after weeping take that one step further and bring life back into the situation.
Not all of us will raise the dead back to life, but all of us, by the grace of God, are able to bring life-filled words to someone’s aching heart. In sowing the seeds of life and joy we can literally see the hurting come back to life when they feel as if they, too, had died.
On life’s pathway we may often stumble and fall, stub our toes and scrape our knees. Let’s get up again, embrace life and continue on the way to the party!
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